In just a few short weeks, we will be receiving such a delightful, exciting gift …
And that gift is the premiere episode of the new season of Marriage Boot Camp!
This season, we're most excited to see Amber Portwood work through her issues with Matt Baier, because even though their relationship obviously didn't work out, there's still a lot we'd like to know about their breakup.
We're also dying to see if Andrew Glennon, her new boyfriend/baby daddy and a crew member for Marriage Boot Camp, makes any sort of cameo.
Plus, if you know Amber, then you know that she's completely incapable of not bringing the drama, right?
And thanks to this special little sneak peek of what has to be some of her most explosive scenes, we know that she really, really brought it.
The clip begins with sirens and flashing text that reads "Amber Alert," which is in kind of poor taste, considering what Amber Alerts actually are, but we get it.
Next, we see her hitting a punching bag with a baseball bat, then she yells "F-ck you, bitch!" at someone — it looks like her mother.
"Do I look f-cking high?!" she screams at someone else.
Later, Amber tells Brandi Glanville to "shut the f-ck up before I flip this f-cking table against your goddamn head," and while we don't know the context, it does seem to be a bit of an overreaction.
In another scene, this one with Matt, she tells him that he's a "piece of sh-t," to which he responds with an incredulous "really?"
"Why do you think I'm so angry?" she asks. "Because you hit me!"
So there's basically two things this could mean.
One, they did one of those therapeutic exercises that they do on the show, he accidentally hit her during it, and thanks to her clear anger issues during this time, it set her off.
Two, he was physically abusive to her during their relationship.
Unfortunately, there is some evidence to that second option — for example, last summer, right around the time she would have been filming this, she admitted in an Instagram rant that she'd been the victim of domestic violence.
"I've been through domestic violence," she said then. "I was the one on the other f-cking end with the domestic violence — it went both ways."
"However," she added, "I never opened my motherf-cking mouth about anybody ever f-cking hitting me! Anybody! Because that's what a real f-cking woman does!"
"That's what a real woman does. I can f-cking take that!"
Obviously that's not true, and it's really truly awful to state that "real women" don't seek help if they're being abused.
But Simon Saran, Farrah Abraham's sometimes boyfriend, claimed that this was true — he even specified that "Matt has punched her on several occasions."
At the very least, we know that Amber is prone to violent relationships, because we saw her beat Gary Shirley more than once in the early seasons of Teen Mom.
There were also rumors that Amber was abusive to Matt, complete with a photo of Matt's injuries that he claimed were from a separate incident altogether.
It's all very, very suspicious, isn't it?
Check out Amber in action in the video below: