Ben Affleck & Lindsay Shookus: Engaged and Expecting a Child?!?!

Pretty much from the time they started dating, rumors of Ben Affleck and Lindsay Shookus getting married have been circulating non-stop.

And in fairness, they really did seem to move rather quickly from the very beginning.

Ben and Shookus

Of course, there’s still the minor obstacle of the fact that Ben is technically still married to Jennifer Garner, but it seems Affleck and Shookus won’t allow that pesky little detail to stand in their way.

According to Radar Online, Ben and Lindsay are currently in the process of planning a Hawaiian wedding.

“They want to do it before the end of summer when Lindsay goes back to work on SNL,” an insider told Radar. “They love Hawaii and had a great time there in April when Ben was filming Triple Frontier.”

Is it just us, or does a Ben Affleck movie set in Hawaii with the title of Triple Frontier sound like something from an SNL sketch?

But we digress.

“Ben’s talking luau, leis and Hawaiian shirts,” the source added.

Ben Affleck, Lindsay Shookus

“He’s already asked Jen to watch the kids while he’s away,” says the source.

Wow, if that’s not the ultimate act of passive aggression.

Hey, Jen do you think you could watch the kids during the one weekend I’m supposed to have them this summer? Lindsay and I have plans. I already bought the rings and everything.

Anyway, the most interesting part of all this is the fact that Ben and Lindsay are reportedly expecting a child together.

“People suspect the sense of urgency is because Lindsay’s pregnant,” the insider claims.

“And nothing hides a bump better than a muumuu dress.”

Well, if the speculation is based on nothing other than the fact that these two seem to be in a hurry and some traditional Hawaiian attire is baggy, then we’re gonna have to go ahead and call BS.

But who knows?

Maybe Lindsay really is pregnant with Ben’s baby, as the tabloids have been claiming for most of the past year.

If so, our sincere congrats go out to a couple that most folks didn’t give much of a chance to.

Just keep Ben away from those mai-tais at the wedding!


Ben Affleck & Lindsay Shookus: Planning a Wedding Even Though He’s Still Married?!

It’s been almost a year since the world first learned that Ben Affleck and Lindsey Shookus are dating, and these days, the couple is reportedly ready to take the next step together.

Unfortunately, there are some sizable barriers blocking their path.

Ben Affleck, Lindsay Shookus

According to a new report from Entertainment Tonight Lindsey is seeking a commitment from Ben, who seems hesitant to pop the question.

But to his credit, there’s a very good reason for that:

“Lindsay and Ben are very much in love,” a source tells the outlet.

“During Ben and Jennifer [Garner’s] split, Lindsay truly felt villainized. Every day she spent with Ben out in the world for people to see felt like another day of public scrutiny, but her love for Ben was worth it,” the insider adds. 

“They both learned to stick by each other during those painful months.”

See, therein lies the issue.

The source makes it sound like Affleck and Garner’s split was an ugly chapter in their lives that’s now over and done with.

But the fact is Ben and Jen still aren’t divorced.

Yes, despite the fact Affleck and Garner have been separated for three years, they’re still legally married.

We’re sure that’s primarily because of legal and financial entanglements, but still …

Lindsay probably isn’t too thrilled about the situation.

The insider adds that Ben and Lindsay are planning to spend their lives together, but have thus far avoided any public discussion of marriage:

“Ben has worked incredibly hard on his sobriety and Lindsay has been his rock. He will be forever grateful for all her love and support,” says the source.

“They are both constantly being asked if they are planning to tie the knot, but for now they taking it one day at a time.”

It’s good that he’s taking his recovery seriously, but we can’t help but think Ben’s leaning pretty hard on that “but, babe, my sobriety” excuse:

“Ben knows he loves Lindsay, but he wants to take things slow for the sake of his sobriety. He’s actually been told to take it slow and he’s heeding that advice,” the insider claims.

“Ben isn’t ready to propose and has no plans to get engaged anytime soon, but Lindsay feels he is worth the wait.”

We’re rooting for ya, Shook.


Jennifer Garner Wishes Ben Affleck a Happy Father’s Day, Is More Mature Than We Are

Jennifer Garner make it very difficult to be a celebrity gossip website.

You see, we specialize in the scandalous; in the bitter break-ups that lead to angry Tweets or unexpected mistresses or, in the ideal scenario, some sort of revenge porn situation.

We’re never sure what to do with a star who possibly gets cheated on, definitely gets snubbed on many occasions…

… and simply responds with kindness and generosity of spirit. 

But this is the situation we’ve often found ourselves in when it comes to Garner and Ben Affleck.

The actress filed for divorce from the actor in April of 2017, well over a year since the celebrities separated amidst talk that Affleck cared more about drinking than about his family.

(Jennifer and Ben are parents to three kids: Samuel, Seraphina and Violet.)

There was even talk at one point that Affleck had been unfaithful to Garner.

Nevertheless, Garner has refused to say anything negative about her ex-husband to the press.

She’s practically gone out of her way in the opposite direction, in fact, praising Affleck as a caring individual and as a dad.

This is what she did again on Sunday.

In honor of an occasion that celebrates men with children, Garner posted a sepia-filtered photo of Affleck on Instagra, along with a very sweet shout-out about his parenting in general.

It reads as follows:

“Our kids are lucky to have a dad who looks at them the way you look at them and loves them the way you love them, @benaffleck. #happyfathersday #threeluckykids #haveagreatday.”

What the heck kind of snarky comment can we make about this nice gesture?

Sheesh, Jennifer!

affleck tribute

Last week, Affleck celebrated his 12-year-old daughter’s school graduation at Ivy at the Shore in Santa Monica.

He and Garner are also parents to a 9-year-old daughter and a 6-year-old and have done all they can to shield these kids from the often-dangerous glare of the spotlight.

Because the stars remain so chummy after their split, there’s been endless talk of an eventual Ben and Jen reconciliation.

There have been many tabloid covers and stories such as the one featured below:

But Affleck seems very happy with girlfriend Lindsay Shookus, who he’s actually been with now for over a year.

And his three children seem very happy with him, too.

Affleck marked Father’s Day on social media by sharing an image of the homemade card from his kids that read: “Love you dad! You are my superhero!”

And he wrote as a caption to it:

I can think of three incredible reasons why today is so special.

Happy Father’s Day to all the dads and father figures out there, and to the women that empower them to be the best they can be.

Okay, fine.

Affleck’s back tattoo is a monstrosity.

But perhaps he’s not so bad after all.

We are all so fortunate beyond measure 


Jennifer Garner & Lindsay Shookus to Ben Affleck: Stop Being a Douche!

It’s been almost a year since the world first learned that Ben Affleck is dating Lindsay Shookus, and though the couple has kept their relationship as low-key as possible, in that time, fans and the press have jumped to the same conclusion about the couple’s dynamic.

Whether it’s fair or not, the picture that’s emerged is one of a self-indulgent manchild meeting his ideal enabler.

This might have something to do with the fact that Ben and Lindsay were spotted drinking together in her hometown shortly after they started dating.

Normally, that wouldn’t be a big deal, but Affleck has been in and out of rehab several times in the past few years, and his friends and family were understandably concerned that he seemed to be throwing caution to the wind.

As for Garner, she’s said to be unconcerned about the relationship and has reportedly informed Shookus that Ben’s drinking is her problem now.

So Lindsay and Jen obviously don’t quite get along, but it seems they’re willing to join forces when the stakes are high enough.

Such as when Ben’s notorious temper threatens to have a negative impact on the lives of his three young children.

Recently, Ben and his kids were hounded by some paparazzi during their weekly visit to their local church.

Ben was less than pleased, and he made his feelings know with an irate tweet:

“Still not sure what is urgently newsworthy about a middle-aged man taking his kids to church,” Affleck wrote.

According to Radar Online, both Jen and Lindsay agreed that his response would only serve to make the situation worse.

And apparently, they joined forces to make Ben see their error of his ways.

After reportedly consulting with Jen, Lindsay addressed the issue with Ben:

“Lindsay told him he doesn’t want to come off negatively like other celebrities when they spout off on their social media,” a source tells Radar.

“It doesn’t make him look good. They argued about it.”

Eventually, Ben came around to Jen and Lindsay’s way of thinking.

“He’s super remorseful and wants to make it right,” says the insider.

So there you have it.

All Ben needs to do to live a drama-free life is to consult with both his girlfriend and his ex before he makes any type of decision.


Ben Affleck on Twitter: I Love My Fugly Tattoos!

It’s been a tough few months in the life of Ben Affleck.

Come to think of it, it’s been a tough couple years for Beantown Benny, but we’ll for brevity’s sake, we’ll stick to the more recent misfortunes.

The latest round of headaches that likely has been dejectedly vaping in a Dodge Charger somewhere has to do with Ben’s back tattoo.

Now, this is a saga that’s been going on for years, but only came to a head this past week, when some candid shirtless beach photos confirmed that Affleck lied about the tattoo being “fake for a movie.”

We may never know what possessed Ben to have a giant, colorful phoenix etched into his flesh, but it’s not hard to figure out why he decided to lie about it:

The tattoo is a big ugly mistake – not unlike the film Gigli – and Ben quite understandably wanted to cover it up.

Mistakes, we all make them – but that doesn’t mean we’re exampt from getting flamed on social media when we screw up.

And more followers means more haters, a lesson Ben is lerarning the hard way as trolls came out of the woodwork to rag on Ben’s horrendous ink.

To make matters worse, now those cronut-munching Niles Crane wannabes at The New Yorker are having a go at poor Ben.

In a piece published last week entitled – we sh-t you not – “The Great Sadness of Ben Affleck,” columnist Naomi Fry roasted the Batfleck within an inch of his life.

Was the article meant to be funny?

We think so, but it’s hard to tell with The New Yorker – a publication which remains stubbornly convinced that sketches of wild animals complaining about oaky chardonnay are the stuff of droll hilarity.

Fry critiqued the photos mercilessly, ragging on Ben’s “pooching” gut and the “blue-gray towel … wrapped protectively around his midsection—recalling a shy teen at the local pool.”

Yes, like her magazine’s famous cartoons, Fry’s piece won’t make you laugh, necesarily, but if you’re a certain type of smug, you may find yourself tempted to share it on Facebook as evidence of your wit and sophistication.

But hey, Ben’s able to laugh at himself, even when the jokes at his expense aren’t exactly Carlin-caliber.

Affleck has dealt with a lot of criticism over the years but it seems he couldn’t resist letting the dwwebs of the Upper East Side know that they’re rubber and he’s glue.

“@NewYorker I’m doing just fine. Thick skin bolstered by garish tattoos,” Affleck tweeted at the magazine today.

Ben knows you have to hit these nerds where it hurts – right in the vocabulary.

Very perspicacious of you, homey.


Ben Affleck & Lindsay Shookus: Back Together After Low-Key Split?!

It’s been a rough few weeks for Ben Affleck, aka Batfleck, aka Beantown Benny, aka He of the Horrendous the Back Tatt That Looks Like Something From A Blacklight Poster in a Head Shop.

For one thing, the whole world has been roasting Affleck’s tattoo for the very good reason that it’s the ugliest sight anyone has laid eyes on since that time Trump went golfing in white shorts.

But there’s more here than just that just the hilarity that is the #PhoenixFail.

You see, Ben has been in Sad Affleck mode in a big way lately.

His melancholia has reached the point that even the tortoise shell-framed Vassar grads at The New Yorker were forced to take a break from writing captions for sketches of animals in therapists’ offices in order to pen a typically high-minded assessment of Ben’s mental state.

Yes, even the actor’s number one confidante Matt Damon has enjoyed ragging on Affleck in recent weeks, a development that’s almost certainly led Ben to text his friend something along the lines of “I don’t like them apples at all.”

Needless to say, these are trying times in the House of Affleck.

Fortunately, Ben has been able to find solace in the fact that he’s still rich and famous and thus, will always find someone willing to overlook his giant mythological back bird. 

Ben has been dating Lindsay Shookus for the better part of the past year, but it seems there was a brief hiatus in the relationship that began around the same time as Ben’s latest round of troubles.

However, according to People magazine, Affleck and Shookus are 100 percent back on these days.

The couple was spotted hanging out in Hawaii earlier this week, and witnesses say they looked very coupled-up.

They may have even engaged in a bit of canoodling.

Sources tell People that Ben and Lindsay are “not rushing anything,” but they “enjoy each others company” and “are in a committed relationship.”

Of course, the question on the mind of many Ben-watchers is – are Affleck and Shookus still drinking together?

Yes, even after Ben’s multiple stints in rehab, he and Lindsay were spotted hitting the sauce together during their travels.

Fortunately, it sounds as though Ben has put the plug in the jug for good these days, and he and Lindsay reportedly drank nothing stronger than coconut water during their time on the big island:

“He has been very on top of his health and responsible,” added the source.

“He wants to be sober and healthy.”

Sounds like Ben might finally be turning things around!

If only there were some sort of mythical creature whose story might provide a suitable analogy for Affleck’s current state of rebirth.


Matt Damon to Ben Affleck: Your Tattoo is Ugly AF, Bruh

Back in 2015, the world first marveled at the hideousness that is Ben Affleck’s giant back tattoo.

Many breathed a deep sigh of relief when Affleck revealed that the tattoo is fake and that he covered a massive segment of his torso with a goofy-ass cartoon phoenix for the sake of a movie.

Sadly, we now know that Affleck was lying about the tattoo being airbrushed on.

Earlier this week, Ben put the horrendous ink on full display while filming a scene set on a beach.

Needless to say, he was roasted to a crisp by the internet’s finest sh-t talkers, both for getting the tattoo in the first place and for lying to the world about it.

But Ben’s got some loyal friends in his corner, people who would never turn their backs on him … possibly for fear that he’d be all, “You know what would look dope, dude? A fire-breathing dragon like slithering up your spine!”

Matt Damon has been Ben’s bestie since the bygone era when Harvey Weinstein was someone people actually wanted to work with.

Last night, Damon appeared on The Daily Show, where he sat down with Trevor Noah to answer the tough questions about #BensBack.

“It’s not one man’s job to tell another man what he can do to his back,” Matt said in a classic dodge.

“I support him in all of his artistic expression.”

Clearly, Damon has mastered the art of throwing shade without really throwing shade.

If he actually liked Ben’s ink even a little bit, Matt likely would have said so.

With his non-response Matt joins the ever-growing list of celebs who think Ben’s phoenix is the fugliest thing 

“You know what we would say in my hometown about that? ‘Bless his heart,’” said Affleck’s ex and noted shade queen, Jennifer Garner.

The other former Jen in Ben’s life was even more direct in her criticism, telling Andy Cohen:

“It’s awful! What are you doing?”

She added:

“His tattoos always have too many colors, they shouldn’t be so colorful. They should be cooler.”

At this point, Ben’s life is basically a party question game:

“Okay, so you’re a millionaire and you get to dress up as Batman. But, you’re covered in horrendous tattoos and your exes flame you  on TV every chance they get. Would you do it?”

It’s a question each of us must answer for himself.