Pete Davidson Posts Disturbing Message … ‘I Really Don’t Want To Be On This Earth Anymore’

Exclusive Details

12:15 PM PT — TMZ has learned Ariana Grande is at the 30 Rock building to see Pete if possible. She tweeted … “I’m downstairs and I’m not going anywhere if you need anyone or anything. I know u have everyone u need and that’s not me, but i’m here too.”

She also apologized for her “dumb joke” about Kanye and Drake’s beef that led to the topic of mental health when Kanye went after her. She said … “i really didn’t mean any harm. all i want everyone to be healthy and happy. so desperately. please. my god.” 

Grande also deleted her previous tweets about “triggering” Kanye and commenting on mental health. 

11:58 AM PT — Pete has made numerous comments on social media in the past about suicidal thoughts to varying degrees. He has now wiped all of that clean by deleting his Instagram account. Sources close to Pete tell TMZ … they believe his emotional turmoil has escalated recently and are very worried about him.

11:43 AM PT — Multiple sources have told us Pete is at ‘SNL’ rehearsing for tonight’s show. It’s bizarre, but it seems like he may have posted his ominous note while he was at work or on the way in.

11:25 AM PT — NYPD tells TMZ … it received a flurry of calls from fans worried about Pete, so they’ve sent officers out to find him to do a welfare check.

Machine Gun Kelly tweeted about the situation, saying he’s on a plane to see Pete to make sure he’s good.

Jon Cryer also just tweeted that he heard Davidson is at ‘SNL’ and accounted for.

Pete Davidson just shared a troubling and cryptic message … implying he’s having suicidal thoughts.

The ‘SNL’ star posted the note on Instagram, saying … “i really don’t want to be on this earth anymore. i’m doing my best to stay here for you but i actually don’t know how much longer i can last.”

It’s unclear to whom Pete’s directing his words, but he adds … “all i’ve ever tried to do was help people. just remember i told you so.”

Davidson’s message seems to be a cry for help — just minutes before he posted it he responded to Kanye West going after his ex, Ariana Grande, by commending Ye for speaking about against mental health issues.

He said … “I can’t explain to you enough how difficult and scary it is to be honest about stuff like this.”

Just 2 weeks ago, Davidson went off on online trolls for harassing and bullying him, telling them he wouldn’t kill himself no matter how hard they tried to get him to. Ariana responded not long afterward, telling her fans to “be gentler” with Pete and others … saying she cares deeply about him and his health.

As you know, it’s been a turbulent year for Pete. He got engaged to Grande and then they split, and he also had to deal with a controversy on ‘SNL’ for making a joke about a wounded vet.

Speaking of ‘SNL’ … there’s an all-new episode tonight with host Matt Damon and musical guests Miley Cyrus and Mark Ronson. We did some checking, and it doesn’t look like Pete was featured in any of the promos this week. It’s unclear if he’ll show up for work tonight.

Pete’s been very open about his mental health issues recently, but it’s clear now … he needs some more help.

Nike’s Phil Knight on Kaepernick ‘I Don’t Know If He’s Being Blackballed’


Nike has put their money behind Colin Kaepernick — and now the man who founded the company tells TMZ Sports, he believes the QB should still be playing in the NFL. 

We saw shoe legend, Phil Knight leaving Michael’s restaurant in New York the other day and while he threw his support behind Colin — he stopped short when we asked if he believed CK is being blackballed by the NFL. 

“I don’t know,” Knight told us … “I don’t know.”

80-year-old Knight still serves as Chairman Emeritus for the Swoosh — the company that recently inked Kaepernick as the face of its “Just Do It” 30th Anniversary Campaign. 

After the first Kaepernick ad dropped back in September, the brand reportedly saw a 31% boost in online sales … so, ya gotta think Phil would be pumped about bringing Kaep back into the fold. 

One more thing … what kind of shoes does the $ 30 BILLION Nike founder rock out in public? 

Phil says they’re special “PK 80s” — a special line of shoes created to honor Phil’s 80th birthday. We’re having a tough time finding the exact model and value of the shoes … but we’re working on it. 

Watch TMZ Sports on FS1 Get the new TMZ Sports app!

Nikki Bella Don’t Let the Pic Fool Ya … She’s Not Back with John Cena


Nikki Bella is NOT reuniting or reconciling when it comes to John Cena … and there’s a perfectly logical reason she posted a romantic pic of them, making fans think they’re tapping in on their relationship. 

Sources close to Nikki tell TMZ … the WWE superstars are still very much single, despite Nikki posting a shot of her and John cuddling in a hot tub at sunset.

We’re told Nikki was simply reminiscing over the past year and thinking back on what she was thankful for — she posted several pics of other people in her life — and John was a part of that. Even though they called off their relationship and stopped talking to each other.

Haters will say she was trolling … but we’re told it was just some Thanksgiving reflection.

And yeah, sounds like the sun really has set on their romance. At least they’ll always have #TBT if you’re jonesin’ to see ‘em together again.

Kurt Warner Warns Jon Gruden … Don’t Trade Derek Carr!!


Jon Gruden traded both Amari Cooper AND Khalil Mack … but Kurt Warner tells TMZ Sports the Raiders coach will REALLY regret things if he gives up on Derek Carr the same way.

“It’s so hard to find one of those guys that when you’ve found him, you better hold on to him,” Kurt says.

Of course, rumors of Chucky trading away Carr have been swirling for weeks … and kicked up once again Sunday when the two were spotted butting heads on the sideline.

Carr’s performance this season hasn’t helped his case, either — leading the Raiders to just a 2-8 record so far.

But … Warner tells us it’d be a big mistake to get rid of Carr — even in Gruden’s complete teardown project.

“I think now it’s just, build around him,” Kurt says.

We also asked Warner about Philadelphia’s quarterback issues … and he tells us why he can’t see any way Doug Pederson pulls Carson Wentz for Nick Foles this year.

Watch TMZ Sports on FS1 Get the new TMZ Sports app!

Sinead O’Connor: I Don’t Want to Spend Time with White People Ever Again!

Sinead O’Connor has been a controversial figure for a few decades, now.

She has recently converted to Islam and goes by Shuhada’ Davitt, but that is not the source of his latest controversy

The issue is a tweet in which she says that she never wants to “spend time with white people” ever again.

Sinead O'Connor converts to Islam

“I’m terribly sorry,” Sinead’s tweet begins.

She continues: “What I’m about to say is something so racist I never thought my soul could ever feel it.”

“But truly I never wanna spend time with white people again,” she writes.

That is such a head-scratcher, but she does offer a strange definition of “white people.”

In parentheses, she writes: “(if that’s what non-muslims are called).”

We don’t claim to be experts in theology, but that word would probably be kafir, not “white people.”

“Not for one moment, for any reason,” Sinead makes clear. “They are disgusting.”

Sinead O'Connor tweets about hating white people

Regardless of her religious adherence, Sinead O’Connor is very, very white.

Converting does not change that, and she’s hardly the only white Muslim — which makes her statement so much stranger.

Unfortunately, that was only one tweet of many.

Sinead followed up her controversial tweet:

“Interesting to see if Twitter bans this when it allows people like Trump and Milbank spew the satanic filth upon even my country,” she wrote.

Twitter has not, as of Wednesday afternoon, done anything of the sort to her tweet.

On top of that, the 51-year-old folk singer seemed eager to get into heated religious discourse.

“How come so called christian and jewish theologians,” her question begins.

She interrupts herself to claim: “(the christian theologians being atheists and satanists actually in practice, though they know it not).”

Sinead continues: “never talk about the smashing of their enemies babies heads on rocks which in all over their psalms?”

What she means to ask is why don’t members of other Abrahamic faiths who claim that Islam is violent because of the Qur’an when their own holy books have similar content.

She then promptly answers her own question. 

“BTW if one IS an intelligent theologian and has taken the journey,” she tweets.

“One would know there is no more talk of ancient violence in the Q’ran as the Tanukh, the Bible, or The sodding Mahabarata,” she writes.

The Tanakh (which stands for Torah, Neviim, and Ketuvim) is the holy book of the Jewish people, known as the Old Testament in Christianity.

The Mahabharata is one of the oldest Sanskrit texts of India, and describes the Bharata dynasty.

“And,” she concludes. “Its ALL EQUALLY IRELLEVANT TO OUR TIMES.”

Which makes one wonder why she brought up old-timey scriptural violence in the first place.

So, there are a few obvious things to unpackage.

Her tweet isn’t racist, exactly, it’s just hostile, prejudiced, argumentative, and deeply confused.

She is a white woman, in terms of what that term actually means.

If she’d said that she didn’t want to hang out with non-Muslims ever again, that would be prejudiced and obnoxious.

But remember that she has been making impulsive and sometimes offensive statements for decades.

Just one year ago, Sinead O’Connor recorded a disturbing video in which she shared that she was suicidal.

She probably converted in the hopes that it will bring her peace, but lashed out online because she cannot help herself.

Sinead O’Connor has been an outspoken critic of organized religion for a very long time.

Unfortunately, her confrontational approach is sometimes off-putting, even to those who share her views.

At the end of her Twitter rant, she did at least acknowledge how bizarre her social media messages have been.

“Final word,” she wrote. “If its ‘Crazy’ to care. Then by all means, spank my ass and call me Fruity loops : )”

We hope that she is getting whatever help and support she needs in this time.

Perhaps her newly found religious community can help.


Lil Xan: I Don’t Want to End Up Like Mac Miller But I Can’t Quit Drugs!

It’s a frightening time for young celebrities, as an epidemic of addiction and substance abuse is claiming lives in Hollywood at an astonishing rate.

Over the course of the past year, a number of promising lives have been lost or forever changed by opioids and other prescription pills, and it seems that there’s no solution to the problem in sight.

In July, Demi Lovato’s near-fatal overdose left fans praying for the singer’s recovery.

(Lovato recently celebrated 90 days of sobriety.)

The death of Mac Miller in September stunned the hip-hop world and left many of his fellow artists thinking twice about lyrics and lifestyles that glorify substance abuse.

One such artist is Lil Xan.

Xan is so steeped in modern hip-hop drug culture that his stage name is a reference to his former substance of choice.

The 23-year-old recently opened up to TMZ in a surprisingly candid new interview in which he discusses his conflicted feelings toward drugs and the music that glorifies them.

The rapper says he’s kicked his addiction to Xanax, but is still “weaning” himself away from other pills.

In the interview, Xan reveals that he sold drugs before making it big in music.

But he also insists he was a drug dealer with a conscience and quit dealing when the often-fatal Fentanyl hit the scene.

“My friends were taking it; they were puking. I was like I can’t … I’m out the game,” Xan says of his decision to retire from dealing and focus on music.

Xan says that like Demi, he’s capable of long periods of sobriety, but notes that he is currently off the wagon.

“I relapsed, and that’s common … Any other addict would understand that sh-t just happens,” he tells TMZ.

“You just relapse. You don’t want to. It’s a process. You need treatment and help, and sometimes that doesn’t even help.”

“It has to come from within. That’s what I’ve learned,” Xan says.

“I’ve gone periods of like six months clean of everything. And that was because of me. I wanted to be clean.”

When the interviewer states that Xan is “clean now,” he corrects her:

“I’m not completely clean. Off Xanax, yes, but I’m still weaning off Norcos [a brand of codeine-based painkiller],” he says.

Xan says he is currently not in rehab, but is living in seclusion “in the forest.”

He adds that he plans to remain in hiding until the release of his upcoming album, which he has described as a tribute to his “hero,” Mac Miller.

We wish Lil Xan all the best in his recovery.