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Farrah Abraham: I Want to Fight Lindsay Lohan AND Paris Hilton!

It’s only been eight months since Farrah Abraham was fired from Teen Mom OG, but the former reality star has already embarked on a new career.

Currently, Farrah is seeking a partner who’s willing to strip down, strap on some protection, and sweat it out on camera.

No, she’s not re-entering the porn world (at least not that we know of).

Instead, Farrah is trying her hand at boxing.

Perhaps she looked at the career of Floyd Mayweather and realized that you can be a truly repugnant human being and still make a ton of money in the ring, or maybe she caught some old episodes of MTV’s Celebrity Death Match and thought it was a documentary.

Whatever the case, Farrah is looking to float like a butterfly and sting like an STD.

She just needs to find an opponent who’s as starved for cash and attention as she is.

Yes, believe it or not, Farrah is having a hard time finding someone who’s willing to punch her in the face.

Perhaps other washed-up celebs are worried about losing to Farrah and falling even further down the pseudo-fame ladder.

Or maybe they’ve heard that urban legend about how if you get too close, the stench of Farrah failure will never wash off and no casting director will ever talk to you again. 

Whatever the case, The Blast is reporting today that both Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton have been offered $ 250,000 to box Farrah.

Even after promoters threw in $ 100,000 to the charity of their choice, both women turned the offer down.

As The Ashley’s Reality Roundup points out, there’s good reason for this.

Lohan has a new reality show on the way, and while she’s desperate for the series to be a hit, fighting another MTV star on camera is likely a bridge too far even for LiLo.

For her part, Paris is getting married soon, and she’s probably in no hurry to have her face rearranged before she walks down the aisle (well, maybe by a licensed plastic surgeon, but that’s a conversation for another time).

And even though her career may have taken a nosedive in recent years, Paris is still a Hilton, which means she’s not exactly hard-up for cash.

So Paris and Lindsay aren’t interested, but that doesn’t mean Farrah is out of options.

Former 16 and Pregnant star Lindsey Nicole recently took to Instagram to talk major trash to Ms. Abraham:

“Really Farrah, you think you’re not a bully?” Lindsey wrote.

“Have you watched any of your episodes?

“You bully your mom, dad, producers, cast members, & anyone you think is less than you. Why don’t you get in the ring with me & try to bully me around and see how that goes.”

You would think that Farrah’s people would be making Lindsey an offer.

Instead, Abraham simply blocked her on Instagram.

Sadly, it’s looking more and more like the only celebrity Farrah will be going toe-to-toe with is Ron Jeremy.

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Kailyn Lowry and Briana DeJesus Throw DOWN in Epic Teen Mom 2 Fight!

So Kailyn Lowry and Briana DeJesus have hated each other for a good while now … we're actually coming up on the one year anniversary!

They haven't been secretive or passive aggressive about their hatred, either, and you definitely know that if you've watched literally any episode from this season of Teen Mom 2.

But this week, MTV aired a special "behind the scenes" episode of some things that happened during the taping of the reunion back in May.

And it was INTENSE.

1. All This Over Javi?

All this over javi
Kailyn and Briana were never really close or anything, but they quickly became enemies last fall when Briana started getting flirty with Kailyn’s ex-husband, Javi Marroquin.

2. Seriously, Over Javi?

Kail and javi wedding
Kail and Javi had been over for a while at that point, but still, Kailyn thought it was inappropriate for Briana, her co-worker, to be getting with her ex, and that’s kind of fair, right?

3. Weird

Javi marroquin and briana dejesus
But in the beginning, Kail was upset because Javi took their son, and also her older son, on a “boy’s trip” to Disney World but conveniently left out the fact that Briana and her kids also came along on the vacation. And that’s also fair.

4. Too Much

Kailyn lowry glasses
But after that, Kailyn and Briana officially decided they hated each other, and got into it on social media, through text messages, via Javi … it was just a lot.

5. Way, WAY Too Much

Briana confronts kail
At the taping of the last Teen Mom 2 reunion, the one from last September that we saw footage from this season, they got into a bit of a spat. Kail called Briana ratchet, Briana told her that she was just salty because she was hanging out with Javi.

6. Just Wait

Kail pic teen mom 2
At the time, it was very dramatic and exciting. But we had not seen anything yet.

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Kailyn Lowry on Briana DeJesus Fight: It’s All Javi’s Fault!

Tonight's episode of Teen Mom 2 is one that fans have been anticipating for quite some time.

Reunion specials are generally considered to be the highlights of the season, but this one should really be a doozy, as we'll finally get to see the fight between Kailyn Lowry and Briana DeJesus.

Well, perhaps "fight" isn't the right word.

We'll get to see Kailyn and Briana very nearly come to blows on at least two separate occasions.

MTV keeps a lot of security on hand these days, which is good news for the cast, bad news for viewers who enjoy bloodshed.

But despite the fact that Kail and Briana were prevented from tearing each other's throats out, things still got awfully ugly.

And now, Ms. Lowry is offering some final thoughts before tonight's title bout:

1. Ready to Rumble

Kailyn lowry glasses
According to reports from the set and audio released by MTV the first altercation began when Kail confronted Bri in her dressing room.

2. The Showdown

Kail has no sh ts to give
Kail decided to have a chat with Briana away from the cameras and the studio audience, so that the two of them could work out their differences in private.

3. A Civil Discussion

Kailyn lowry vs briana dejesus fight audio
As you can see in this clip, the sit-down didn’t quite go according to plan, and Kail attempted to engage Bri in a physical fight.

4. Cutting to the Chase

Kail pic teen mom 2
“Why don’t you tell me why you felt so comfortable commenting what you commented on Instagram?” Kail asked her rival at one point. “This isn’t about Javi [Marroquin], this isn’t about the show.

5. The Chris Conundrum

Lowry kail pic
“I want to know why you felt so comfortable to say some sh-t about my kids and Chris?” Lowry elaborated, referring to comments Bri made about her third baby daddy, Chris Lopez.

6. The Point of Contention

Kail pic
Kail goes on to suggest that Bri crossed a line by dragging her family into the fight. “You don’t want me talking about your kids; you don’t want me talking about your mom …” she said at the time. Now, she’s elaborating on those comments.

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