Lady Gaga & Christian Carino: Wedding Plans Revealed?!

Back in November, several media outlets (including this one) reported on the widespread rumor that Lady Gaga and Christian Carino are engaged.

The couple has yet to confirm those claims, but it looks more and more like they’re letting their silence do the talking.

Gaga has never been shy about refuting inaccurate reports about her private life, so it seems she has no problem with the public believing that she’s soon to be married.

And she certainly didn’t seem shy about rocking a massive oval-shaped pink diamond on her commitment finger at this year’s Grammys.

So either she really said yes, or she’s just messing with her Little Monster’s minds at this point.

As best we can tell, Gaga’s breakup with Taylor Kinney and the ensuing media circus left a lasting mark on the singer, and this time around, she’s keeping a much tighter lid on her prenuptial preparations.

Of course, no one as obsessed-over as Gaga can really keep a secret for very long.

So perhaps it should come as no surprise that Life & Style claims to have uncovered the mystery of where and when Gaga and Carino are planning to tie the knot.

“Gaga and Christian are planning to wed in Italy this summer,” a source exclusively tells the tabloid.

“It will be an over-the-top affair combined with classic Italian traditions.”

Yes, Lady Gaga’s wedding ceremony will combine the outlandish with the traditionally Italian.

In other news, water remains wet; Pope Francis has no plans to convert to Judaism, etc.

Christian Carino

The insider goes on to reveal that guests will enjoy an “Italian-inspired menu,” which frankly, doesn’t feel like much of a bombshell following the revelation that the wedding will actually take place in Italy.

Of course, it would be hilarious to have your family and friends arrive by gondola at a Lake Como villa just to be like, “Gotcha, bitches! Hot Pockets!”

Sadly, most brides aren’t big on punking their guests. Go figure.

Carino, 48, is an agent at CAA, and despite counting Justin Bieber and Harry Styles among his A-list clients, he maintains a relatively low-profile and seems to enjoy the civilian life.

Which is good, because while there are occasional exceptions (Jay and Bey, Posh and Becks), there’s generally only room for one superstar as big as Gaga in a marriage.


Grammys Seating Chart’s Got Elton, Lady Gaga, Tony Bennett and Miley Clustered Together

Sir Elton John scored a better view than Miley Cyrus at the Grammys … scheduled duet be dammed. Here’s a look at the seating chart for Sunday’s Grammys at Madison Square Garden in NYC … where Elton’s sitting right in front…


Grammys Seating Chart’s Got Elton, Lady Gaga, Tony Bennett and Miley Clustered Together

Sir Elton John scored a better view than Miley Cyrus at the Grammys … scheduled duet be dammed. Here’s a look at the seating chart for Sunday’s Grammys at Madison Square Garden in NYC … where Elton’s sitting right in front…


Lady Gaga: Happy New Year! Look at My Butt!

Lady Gaga is poised for a pretty big 2018.

Back in November, we learned that Gaga is engaged to Christian Carino.

Shortly thereafter, the singer announced that she’d signed on for a Vegas residency, an arrangement that’s already proven wildly lucrative for several members of pop music’s royal family, including Britney Spears and Jennifer Lopez.

But do true love and a wildly successful career really bring one happiness?

Perhaps for some, but this is Gaga we’re talking about.

She came to slay, and she won’t rest until her takeover is complete.

She wants it all:

The wealth, the fame, the adoration … and, of course, the ass:

Gaga rang in the new year by tweeting the above photo.

“Happy New Year. To happiness. Health. Love. And to the simplicity of beautiful unforgettable nature, life,” she captioned the image.

Yes … nature.

That caption is the social media equivalent of walking into a room naked save for a pair of heels and asking everyone if they like your new shoes.

Needless to say, the pic was quite popular amongst Gaga’s devoted fans, amassing over 4,000 comments in just 24 hours.

The Little Monsters paid tribute to their queen in multiple languages, and while we won’t pretend to have understood every comment, we’re pretty sure most of them translated to “dat ass.”

The Gaga butt has been the stuff of legend for years, but like Haley’s Comet, it’s a big deal every time it makes an appearance.

And with a wedding on the horizon, this might be our last glimpse of the iconic ass in its unmarried form.

So soak it in, folks.

And any time this year gets you down, simply make like Gaga’s fantastic ‘donk:

Turn toward the sun; be your best self, and no matter what happens, don’t allow yourself to be put to be publicly dissed by Leonardo DiCaprio.

He might have an Oscar now, but that does not give him the final say on all things butt-related.

We’re pretty sure Kris Jenner holds that honor.


Lady Gaga and Christian Carino: Engaged!

While not every lady spends her days gazing forlornly out the window, hoping that a dashing man will come by and sweep her off her feet, that’s still a perfectly acceptable way of finding your happiness.

And it looks like happiness has found Lady Gaga.

Remember reports that Christian Carino asked Lady Gaga’s father for his blessing to marry Lady Gaga? Well, guess what?!

Us Weekly reports that Lady Gaga and Christian Carino are engaged!

So, as we told you back in July, Christian Carino was spending time with Lady Gaga and her family.

Not every boyfriend — even serious ones — gets along with his girlfriend’s family, but apparently Christian didn’t have a hard time getting along with Gaga’s family.

We were admittedly feeling less than comfortable with the report that he asked Lady Gaga’s father for his blessing to propose to her.

There’s a lot about that antiquated custom that speaks of unequal gender dynamics.

Basically, we tend to associate that sort of thing with, say, the Duggar fertility cult, where daughters are the property of their father until he agrees to transfer that property to an approved husband. (Gross)

But it may be that Christian Carino was just testing the waters and making sure that he wasn’t going to upset Lady Gaga’s relatives and that they didn’t think that he was taking advantage of her somehow.

After all, Christian Carino and Lady Gaga started dating back in February. That is not a long time to be in a relationship.

Whatever it was, it apparently went over well — because they apparently got engaged over the summer.

We hope that news about that breaking didn’t spoil whatever surprise Christian Carino had planned.

Us reports that the couple’s current focus is, of course, on Lady Gaga’s health.

Lady Gaga has fibromyalgia, which you’ve probably heard about through commercials for prescription medicines if nowhere else.

Fibromyalgia is an agonizing illness that causes widespread muscle pain and tenderness.

Other symptoms can include fatigue, memory problems, and mood shifts and disorders.

Fibromyalgia is a chronic ailment, meaning that it can come and go with flare-ups that are difficult if not impossible to predict.

Chronic illnesses absolutely suck, folks.

We don’t know how many symptoms Lady Gaga is experiencing with fibromyalgia. Every patient is different.

She’s currently focused upon recovery.

Honestly, we think that it’s great that Christian Carino and Lady Gaga are engaged even with this knowledge.

Unfortunately, a lot of people — whether they’re dating or married — seem to step back when their partner develops an illness. Chronic ailments, in particular, seem to send some loved ones running for the hills.

It’s sad, but true. Just look at the suspicious timing of The Weeknd ending things with Selena Gomez. Reports say that he started to lose interest right around when she got her kidney transplant.

We’re really rooting for Lady Gaga and Christian Carino, though.

Maybe they’ll take that whole “in sickness and in health” thing seriously.

Lady Gaga has done so much good for the world.

We don’t just mean her music, though good music makes the world a better place just by spreading passion, art, inspiration, and joy.

She’s been a prominent proponent of LGBT+ rights from day one, using her voice and platform to stand up for minority rights has done an incalculable amount of good for the world.

She deserves good in her life and she deserves love.

We just look forward to when she and Christian confirm this with an announcement.

But that will come at a time of their choosing.