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Look, everybody knows that Farrah Abraham is wild and wacky and all that. It’s not new information at this point, not by a long shot.
But still, sometimes the things that come out of her mouth are just so insane that you can’t help but stop and appreciate it.
Like, how is it even possible for her to be as delusional as she is sometimes?
Does she just lack all self-awareness? Is she perpetually confused? Is there some Farrah who is capable of acting like a normal human being in an alternate universe and we accidentally got this one?
It’s hard to understand how Farrah is so Farrah-like, but here we are.
And man, this nonsense she’s spouting now is something else …
See, Farrah and her poor daughter Sophia are out in Palm Springs right now for Coachella.
Over the weekend, Farrah shared some photos of herself at the festival, promoting different products like her life depended on it — though now that she’s done with Teen Mom, her livelihood almost definitely depends on it.
In one of the photos, she and Sophia posed with some products at Sephora, apparently leading some people to wonder if that dynamic mother-daughter duo would be doing Coachella together.
But Farrah needs you to know that that is not the case.
In an interview with Us Weekly, Farrah said that Sophia is “just so fun!”, and that “we have henna, we have braids, it’s like a girl party everyday.”
“I mean, these are the moments right now that I love. I couldn’t trade it for anything else.”
That’s pretty sweet, right?
But since the interview was actually done at Coachella, she felt the need to add that Sophia was in bed, not in attendance.
“I just have to say,” she told the magazine, “I’m sorry, the inner-mom and the critical parent in me is like, I’m at the Coachella festival and I have to say, when I see a newborn, I honestly don’t think it’s a safe place for children.”
“That’s why my daughter’s at a resort, enjoying the pools and the country club with a nanny.”
She explained that the area is “so serene and beautiful,” but “I don’t think that Coachella, with drugs and psychedelic sh-t, is safe for a kid to be around.”
“I kind of question when I was reading on my way here, I was reading that some parents are saying, ‘Yeah, bring your kids! It’s fun for the kids.'”
Just so she’s perfectly clear, she added “I honestly don’t think it’s safe for kids, so I have to disagree.”
So this is Farrah Abraham discussing what is and is not a safe, healthy environment for children.
On Teen Mom, Farrah often left baby Sophia unattended in dangerous situations — around stairs without gates, for instance.
She left Sophia on her bed as an infant (she fell off), and she also left her in the kitchen sink during a bath (she turned on the hot water and burned herself).
She waxed her eyebrows when she was a toddler, and she once said that it was healthy for them to spend time apart at that age so they could each do their own thing.
She let Sophia around her own mother, Debra Danielsen, when she sobbed and threatened to kill herself.
She’s said that Debra was abusive, but she’s left Sophia with her for weeks at a time.
Just last week, she brought her along when she got butt injections, and she even got her to film the occasion.
This is just a very, very short list of things that Farrah has done, but sure, bringing a kid to Coachella is the worst thing you could do as a parent, and she’s totally fit to criticize you for it.
This girl …
From the very start of their relationship, Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright faced some pretty severe challenges, many of them resulting from what Taylor describes as his “Peter Pan complex.”
Jax will soon be 39 years old, but the current season of Vanderpump Rules features some of his most batsh-t behavior yet, and Brittany has tolerated all of it … only to get unceremoniously kicked to the curb on last night’s episode.
To understand how bizarre and thoroughly unexpected this move was, we need to go back and re-examine how bonkers Taylor’s behavior has been throughout this season.
Things started off with a bang – literally – when Jax cheated on Brittany with Faith Stowers.
From there, the situation quickly got cranked up to 11 when it was revealed that Stowers might be pregnant with Taylor’s baby.
(That rumor was quickly revealed to be some nonsense that Faith cooked up in order to expand her role on the show. Shady stuff, to be sure, but it’s kind of behavior we’ve come to expect from the SUR staff.)
With the help of some new-age mumbo-jumbo, Jax calmed down for a few weeks … that is until last week’s episode when he had a full-blown meltdown at SUR, even going so far as to flip Lisa Vanderpump the bird.
We’ve seen Jax lose control under the influence of one too many Pump-tinis in the past, but this was a whole new level.
Needless to say, many suspected that he’d traded in his calming stone for a different kind of rock.
We guess it’s not surprising that last night’s episode saw the return of Contrite Jax, a character who’s getting more and more pathetic as he approaches 40.
We expected the usual hollow apologies and pseudo-self-
“I’m not happy with myself. I don’t like who I am and it’s not because of you. Look at all the s–t I’ve caused this summer.”
Yes, it was a rare moment of self-awareness from Jax. Guess all that Reiki therapy is finally paying off!
Just kidding, it was his way of kicking off a classic “it’s not you; it’s me” speech.
“You deserve to be happy. You deserve to get married. You deserve to have kids. You deserve to have someone treat you like the princess that you are,” Jax said, sounding very much like he was auditioning for a sequel to The Notebook.
“I am just not that person. I am not good in relationships. You deserve a lot better than me. I just don’t think we can be together anymore.”
Viewers were momentarily hopeful that Brittany would finally free herself of what seems to be an absurdly unhealthy relationship:
“F—k you, I am f—king leaving ‘Cause I don’t want to be with you,” she shouted at one point.
“This is exactly what you wanted to do. You said it a long time ago, that you wanted to break up with me, so good job.”
Yes, it did seem like Jax was merely capitalizing on the drama of recent weeks and using it as an excuse to end a relationship that he’s wanted to get out of several months.
But the episode was filmed several months ago, and remarkably, it seems Jax and Brittany are still going strong and bracing themselves for another summer of Patron-fueled mayhem.
In fact, just this morning, Jax was tweeting not only about his love for Brittany, but the future he envisions for the children they’ll have together.
“Our daughter is going to be in pageants I know it.. I am in trouble. who am I kidding I am gonna be the biggest pageant dad ever!
Indeed, Brittany confirmed in a recent interview that she and Jax are still an item after more than two years of constant drama:
“He’s so much better,” she said. “I feel like we’re so much better than we’ve been in a long time.”
As verification that she and Jax are gearing up to for another summer of WeHo insanity, she wrote on Instagram, “New Summer, New Us.”
We cringe to think imagine it … and we can’t wait to see what happens.
Watch Vanderpump Rules online to get caught up on one of the show’s most bonkers seasons to date.
The Real Housewives of Atlanta fans just received some real, raw and terrible news:
One of the franchise’s most famous faces has said she will not return for the next all-new run of episodes.
Or the one after that… or the one after that.
Yup, folks, it’s true: Kim Zolciak is outta there.
On Saturday, the mother of six, who was traveling with husband Kroy Biermann, was stopped by a TMZ cameraman at the Los Angeles airport.
Asked about her future on The Real Housewives of Atlanta, Zolciak made her answer as clear as can be, responding that she is “never, never” appearing on the series.
Because the show causes “too much unneeded stress,” she said.
Such a stance should not come as a shock to fans of this Bravo program.
Zolciak’s feud with NeNe Leakes reached new levels of intensity, immaturity and, some would say, racism over the past several weeks.
The reality stars, along with Kim’s daughter, went back and forth over whether NeNe has roaches in her home and, basically, over which of them sucks the most.
Prior to Kim’s TMZ-related confirmation, Andy Cohen even told People Magazine he assumed the veteran cast member had screamed her final on-air insult.
“I think she’s done, yeah,” Cohen told the publication, recounting the tension in filming the the Real Housewives season 10 reunion with Zolciak-Biermann and longtime rival Leakes:
“[Kim] walked out of that reunion and I said, ‘Yeah, I’ve seen the last of that wig at these reunions.'”
Here’s a glimpse at that walk-out:
Zolciak, of course, departed the show that made her famous back in its fifth season to film her own reality show Don’t Be Tardy./
But she made a triumphant and well-publicized return for Season 10 last year.
The three-part Real Housewives reunion special to which Cohen refers above kicked off on April 8 and has already stirred more than its share of hilarious controversy.
Case in point?
Marlon Wayans actually reminded the world he’s still alive a few days ago when he dissed Kim via Instagram by sharing an image of her from the reunion and writing:
“No we are not in production on White Chicks 2. The f–k?!”
Zolciak was offended by this jab.
“Was always a super big fan of yours and my kids loved you,” she wrote in the comments section. “This hurts but I guess its all for laughs.”
Hey, we laughed.
And we also assume we’ll see plenty of Kim going forward, despite this declaration.
She has quite the strong social media presence, having formed somewhat of a partnership with daughter Brielle.
They are always joking and posing together on Instagram and we’d be stunned if they don’t sign up for their own series at some point.
Just two days ago, perhaps in reply to this stage in her life and whatever the future holds, Zolciak wrote online:
Successful people maintain a positive focus in life no matter what is going on around them.
They stay focused on their past successes rather than their past failures, and on the next action steps they need to take to get them closer to the fulfillment of their goals rather than all the other distractions that life presents to them.
Will you miss her in Atlanta?
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