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Morgan Spurlock Sued for Breach of Contract as Result of Sexual Misconduct Admission

Morgan Spurlock admitting to past sexual misconduct screwed over the production company he was working with, and there’s a bunch of money missing … according to a new suit. Turner Entertainment Network claims the “Super Size Me” filmmaker…

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Morgan Spurlock Sued for Breach of Contract as Result of Sexual Misconduct Admission

Morgan Spurlock admitting to past sexual misconduct screwed over the production company he was working with, and there’s a bunch of money missing … according to a new suit. Turner Entertainment Network claims the “Super Size Me” filmmaker…

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Piers Morgan: Omarosa Offered Me Sex to Let Her Win The Apprentice!

In case you decided to move to a cabin in the woods to focus on your beard growing skills sometime around November 9, 2016, then you may not be aware that D.C.’s most diseased rats have been fleeing the sinking ship that is the Trump administration in droves.

The latest casualty of the leakiest vessel on the Potomac is Omarosa Manigault, the former Apprentice contestant who managed to land a gig in Trump’s communications department because America has officially completed its transformation into a Mike Judge fever dream.

Since being uncereomoniously sh-tcanned by White House Chief of Staff John Kelly, Omarosa has been appearing on Celebrity Big Brother, where she’s become the show’s resident harbinger of doom, routinely scaring the hell out of her castmates with tales of corruption and hypocrisy inside the Trump administration.

Not surprisingly, this practice has earned her the ire of self-proclaimed journalist and noted angry potato Piers Morgan.

Morgan recently embarked on a second career as a professional Trump bootlicker, which means he took as his sacred duty to burn Manigault’s reputation to the ground.

And since they both appeared on The Apprentice – our current administration’s answer to the Hitler Youth – it was easy for Piers to claim insider knowledge of Omarosa’s shady past.

“I’ve met a lot of vile human beings in my life, from dictators and terrorists to sex abusers and wicked conmen,” Morgan wrote in a piece for the Daily Mail on Tuesday.

“But I’ve never met anyone quite so relentlessly loathsome as Omarosa; a vicious, duplicitous, lying, conniving, backstabbing piece of work.”

Piers went on to tear Omarosa apart as basically the worst person he’s ever met, while at the same time absolving Trump of any blame for giving her a job in the freakin’ White House:

“Which beggars the question: what the hell was she doing inside the world’s most powerful building for 12 months? The answer, as we can now see, was amassing a whole mass of damaging information to now use against President Trump and his administration on Celebrity Big Brother,” he wrote.

Well, that’s just boring, Piers.

We just assume everyone in the White House is compiling information so that they can either write a scathing tell-all or turn state’s evidence.

We thought you were gonna answer the far more intriguing question of how she got hired in the first place.

From there, Piers goes on to describe a ruthlesslty ambitious woman who would do anything to succeed.

Trigger warning: “anything” here includes having sex with Piers Morgan.

“Omarosa sidled up to me at the New York Mercantile Exchange and said, quite seriously: ‘Piers, do you want a showmance?’ ‘A what?’ I replied.

“‘A showmance. You know, a romance on the show — we get it on together. Happens all the time on Apprentice. Everyone has sex together. Then we can make lots of money out of it,’” Morgan wrote.

“I stared at her grasping, ferociously ambitious little eyes, and laughed: ‘You must be joking, you deluded woman.’ She didn’t take it well. ‘What are you? Gay?’” 

gnoring the roast-able bounty that is everything else about him, Omarosa then zeroed in on Morgan’s sexuality in an attempt to … well, we’re not really sure what she was trying to accomplish at this point.

“Because I’d rejected her revolting sex plot, she decided the best line of attack was to repeatedly question my sexuality in the most crude and offensive manner imaginable,” Morgan’s op-ed continued.

“On another occasion, in front of boxing champion Lennox Lewis, she said: ‘Hey Piers, I hear you got caught sucking a gay waiter’s c—k in a hotel pool?’ This was a lie. I’m not gay and she hadn’t heard that about me. She’d just made it up to smear me and to provoke me into a confrontation.”

Morgan concludes his piece:

“Beneath the laughs though lay a less savoury truth: Omarosa is a reprehensible human being, prepared to offer sex to win a reality TV show and use the most vile homophobic slurs against rival contestants.”

Wow. Piers Morgan is calling someone else vile and reprehensible?!

Is this some sort of Fight Club situation where we’re gonna find out he and Omarosa were the same person this whole time?

Obviously, we’re torn by this situation, because Piers is the worst, but Omarosa is also the worst.

There was a time when it was impossible for two things to be worst, but 2018 is bringing us to new depths as a society.

It’s a good time to kiss your loved ones and make peace with your higher power, folks, because it’s on February.

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Donald Trump to Piers Morgan: Why Should I Apologize For Racist Tweets?

The campaign and presidency of Donald Trump have brought all manner of D-list boot-lickers out of the woodwork, many of whom have attempted to forge second careers out of their willingness to publicly fellate the Donald.

Scott Baio, Omarosa, Ted Nugent, and Stacey Dash are just some of the lackeys to emerge from the “where are they now?” file in hopes of winning Trump’s favor.

But of all the has-beens who have put their remnants of their reputations on the line for a man who clearly has no loyalty to his minions (ask Steve Bannon about that one) perhaps none is more perplexing than Piers Morgan.

In the States, Morgan might be best known as the guy who once co-hosted a cut-rate talent show with Sharon Osbourne, but in his native UK, he still has a career.

As the host of Good Morning Britain is basically the British equivalent of Matt Lauer … and we say that with full awareness that Lauer is a creep who was despised by his co-workers and received praise only when he announced his decision to finally go away.

On this morning’s show, Piers was as giddy as a schoolgirl, having finally secured an interview with his longtime Twitter crush, DJT.

For the most part, Morgan lobbed a bunch of softball nonsense at the president, but remarkably, he did actually broach a difficult subject by bringing up Trump’s retweets of Britain First, a bigoted hate group whose views have been universally condemned by British politicians.

Trump didn’t deny that he retweeted the group three times (“Well, three times. Boom, boom, boom. Quickly. Yeah,” he hilariously described the action), but he also refused to apologize for one of the dumbest moves of a presidency characterized solely by dumb moves.

“Here’s what’s fair: If you’re telling me they’re horrible, racist people I would certainly apologize, if you’d like me to do that. I know nothing about them,” Trump said.

When Morgan basically replied, “That’s some Palin-caliber word salad there, boss, but folks hane more finely-tuned BS detectors on this side of the pond,” Trump elaborated thusly:

“I don’t want to be involved with people like that. But you’re telling me about these people because I know nothing about these people.”

That was apparently good enough for Piers who took to Twitter after the interview to declare that Trump had “publicly apologised.”

Now, obviously, dumb Trump tweets are nothing new, but the Britain First links took things to a dangerous new level, as for the first time, the president was presenting an immediate physical threat to civilians of an allied nation.

Britain First followers have been known to engage in racially-charged hate crimes, and when their views are legitimized by none other than the president of the United States, it makes life measurably more dangerous for civilians in the UK and throughout the world.

As this week’s CNN threats reminded us, the president’s words have real-world consequences, and what’s nothing more than a petty social media feud to Trump is a literal call to arms for some of his followers.

But hey, if his apology is good enough for Piers Morgan, were sure it’s good enough to quell the homicidal rage of a heavily-armed far-right militia group.

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