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Khloe Kardashian is expecting, and that’s been out in the open for months, now. Khloe even finally confirmed her pregnancy.
And while Khloe melted the internet with her “mom” photo, she says that not everything’s quite perfect. Namely, she’s getting way too much family advice.
She wants one of her sisters in particular to “shut the f–k up.” Uh-oh.
Khloe Kardashian spoke to Entertainment Tonight and gushed about her pregnancy. And what’s been getting on her nerves.
For one thing, she’s pretty darn tired of hearing people tell her to stop her workouts.
“It’s bizarre to me that people don’t want me to be happy and stay healthy and fit.”
We don’t know that we’ve heard that sentiment from anyone … except maybe from Amy Schumer that one time.
But we guess that people have been concern-trolling Khloe about her workouts, saying that it’s “not good” for her pregnancy.
“My doctor wants me to work out everyday if I could, so I’m doing doctor’s orders and I feel good.”
We’ve seen countless “fit mom” pregnancies, and it never seems to harm the baby, folks.
In case some mothers read this and go “wait, the doctors never told me that,” Khloe explains why the doctors want her to keep working out.
“Whatever you do before you’re pregnant, you’re allowed to continue, and they say it leads for a better delivery.”
To clarify, she means in terms of fitness. Obviously, you don’t get to keep drinking alcohol.
“I feel great, and I would feel horrible if I was just sitting around, overeating all day…”
Ah, yes. What a nightmare it would be to sit and overeat. (That is sarcasm, folks)
“I don’t have swollen feet, I don’t have a lot of these things because I’m staying so active right now. So, as long as I can, I want to keep that up.”
Khloe then goes into talking about her show.
No, not Keeping Up With The Kardashians. The one you’ve probably forgotten about: Revenge Body.
“From season one to season two… we change the format a little bit, and also I now have celebrity guests that want to come on and join the show, which is cool.”
Honestly, the celebrity guests that she had on Kocktails With Khloe were a selling point, so this sounds like a good idea.
“There’s way more pressure for season two, I will say, but it’s exciting.”
And Khloe talks about the show’s title.
“I never thought of my body as revenge, I just did something for myself, but everyone else was like, ‘You have this revenge body.’ So I played with it.”
Success is the best revenge, folks.
“I was like, OK, cool let’s run with that.’ And now, I think the hardest thing is maintaining.”
Yep. One day we’ll all get patches or cybernetic implants to keep our flesh prisons looking how we want. In the mean time … we’re stuck with exercise.
“I think its important to show people you can turn your life around. You can go through hell and high water, and you can still come out and have a beautiful positive happy life.”
And then Khloe talks about a major pain in her pregnancy: getting advice from her family:
“[I got] a lot [of advice from my sisters]. Too much.”
She’s a first time mom, and her sisters include a couple of very experienced moms.
“I’ve gotten to the point… I’m like, ‘OK, shut the f–k up and take your own advice.'”
That’s … pretty harsh. And Khloe singles out once sister in particular.
“Like, I love Kourtney, but… I’m going to figure it all out, I promise you. We’re all going to learn.”
Honestly, I’m going to figure it out is not a reassuring line from a soon-to-be parent. Also, Khloe’s never balked at giving people “advice.”
“So some advice is great, but it’s also not what you say, it’s how you say it.”
Speaking to Ellen, Khloe said that her pregnancy was miserable for the first trimester.
And she reiterates that point:
“The first few months is not sexy, because it’s like, you’re just a little chubby. No one will know you’re pregnant, they’re just like, ‘Oh, you should get back in the gym.'”
Well, she kept it secret. Also, anyone telling you to get back to the gym is probably a terrible friend.
“And you just feel the worst. So I think now that I’m showing more I feel sexy.”
“Gosh, just having a family [is the most unexpected gift].”
Not too unexpected though, right?
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It may have taken the most boneheaded of all boneheaded moves, but Logan Paul claims to have reached an epiphany.
Kind of. Sort of.
Either that, or the wildly popular YouTube star has realized what he needs to do from a public relations standpoint.
Earlier this week, Paul got in scalding hot water for basically being an insensitive jackass.
He uploaded a video to his social media account of him and some buddies walking through a forest in Japan that is known for people choosing to take their own lives there.
Indeed, it is actually known as the “suicide forest.”
At one point, Paul comes across a dead body, films it for multiple minutes and even makes a few jokes about it.
The clip has since been deleted, but it was viewed by millions of people, all of whom saw Paul make funny faces in the direction of the corpse, while also zooming in for a close-up.
It was an example of disgusting behavior and illuminating behavior, reflective of a culture in which people will film anything if they think it could go viral.
In response, Paul apologized.
In rather obnoxious fashion.
“Let’s start with this – I’m sorry,” he said on New Year’s Day, adding:
“This is a first for me. I’ve never faced criticism like this before, because I’ve never made a mistake like this before.
“I’m surrounded by good people and believe I make good decisions, but I’m still a human being. I can be wrong.
“I didn’t do it for views. I get views. I did it because I thought I could make a positive ripple on the Internet, not cause a monsoon of negativity. That’s never the intention.
“I intended to raise awareness for suicide and suicide prevention and while I thought ‘if this video saves just ONE life, it’ll be worth it,’ I was misguided by shock and awe, as portrayed in the video. I still am.”
He went on to talk about his monumentally huge following and didn’t really come across all that regretful in this mea culpa.
So then Paul tried again.
In a video (which he monetized), Paul at least sounded a bit more contrite during apology number-two, saying at one point:
“I do not deserve to be defended … I’m ashamed of myself. I’m disappointed in myself. And I promise to do better. I will do better.”
But he won’t try to do better any time soon; because he won’t be sharing any new videos any time soon.
“Taking time to reflect,” Logan shared with his 3.9 million Twitter followers Wednesday night. “No vlog for now. See you soon.”
Prior to making this decision, Paul had uploaded at least one 15-minute video online every day for 460 days in a row.
But maybe, possibly, he finally understands just how much he effed up with this latest one.
“Our hearts go out to the family of the person featured in the video,” a spokesperson for YouTube told E! News in a statement.
“YouTube prohibits violent or gory content posted in a shocking, sensational or disrespectful manner.
“If a video is graphic, it can only remain on the site when supported by appropriate educational or documentary information and in some cases it will be age-gated.
“We partner with safety groups such as the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline to provide educational resources that are incorporated in our YouTube Safety Center.”
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As we all know, Derick Dillard considers allowing trans kids to be themselves is “child abuse.” But have you wondered what he thinks good parenting looks like?
Apparently, he thinks that it looks like two incredibly bored children.
At least, Derick decided to read to his two very young sons the story of Jesus’ birth, directly from the Bible. No photos. And fans were quick to comment with their very strong opinions.
Derick Dillard captioned his photoset:
“Christmas Eve, reading the Christmas story with my boys. Doesn’t get much better than that! Thank you Jesus!”
For some families, that’s a tradition. For others it isn’t.
Though fans were divided, let’s start with the priase that he earned.
“Beautiful family. God bless you all!”
“You are such a great dad, Derick! Merry Christmas to you and your beautiful family.”
We don’t know that a “great dad” would go on social media and repeatedly slam a teenage girl because he disagrees with her identity, but … well, he’s been fired for that.
“I’m not really a religious person. most normal everyday average people I know DO read the Christmas story out of the Bible on Christmas to their children and some not even really religious people do also.”
Interestingly, I’d personally never heard of that tradition, but I believe that plenty of folks do it.
“There is nothing abnormal,” that commenter continued. “About this and how they read the Christmas story Christmas Eve.”
That same commenter continued:
“I am sure the Duggars have children’s books as well but to come to someone’s page and tell them how to raise their children — takes much gall. Wow”
Another saw criticism of Derick and lashed out:
“Remember, you’re commenting with very sick, wicked souls! These people hate God, His Son Jesus Christ and God’s word. They’re just here to tear down anything Christian!”
That is the sort of paranoia that you see sometimes. If you believe that a critique of one man is an attack against an entire faith, you … probably need to relax.
Another affirmed that they thought that reading directly from the Bible is what they prefer:
“Some of us believe that straight from the Bible is best. Not watered down versions of the Christmas story. Some children’s bible books are excellent don’t get me wrong, however reading straight from Gods word every Christmas is an amazing tradition.”
Others chimed in, suggesting that reading directly from the Bible isn’t ideal with young children, especially when one of the listeners is a literal baby.
“Kids like kid’s books, not old fashioned text. fine if you want to read them the nativity story but at least do it in a format that they understand. kids like pictures.”
Children do enjoy picture books. Especially when they’re still learning words. (Again, Samuel is a literal baby)
“The whole situation is very creepy.”
That comment, we imagine, has less to do with the reading and more to do with Derick using it as a photo op.
“I bet these kids would appreciate having a dad who cares enough about them to get off his lazy butt and get a.job so he can support them as opposed to grifting clueless fans to support them.”
That, of course, is a jab at how Derick Dillard begs fans for cash. Especially now that he’s lost his spot on Counting On.
Another commenter chimed in:
“They aren’t in harm way they grift in Arkansas”
Others took issue with Derick Dillard’s parenting.
“Aww! It looked like Izzy was going to hug little Sam before his daddy pulled him away to make him listen to something he can’t fully understand yet.”
Israel and Samuel were clearly more interested in each other (awww!) than in listening to their father read.
“Why aren’t you acknowledging little Sam? Your arm isn’t even around him. At least Izzy and Jill love that sweet baby.”
Derick seemed invested in his little photo op.
“There are so many wonderful children’s books targeted to their ages, which would include pictures and be ever so much more appropriate for these two.”
If you’re going to do an activity with your children, it should be tailored to your children.
To their interests and their capabilities.
Even a baby as young as Samuel can look at a picture book, and maybe understand a few more words in the process.
Still, it seems like a harmless tradition, and some people — on both sides — got super worked up about it.
Maybe it’s because Derick Dillard himself is such a divisive figure? In which case, we’d question why he doesn’t lay low on social media for a while.
But then we remember that he likes to beg for money and then use those donated funds to go out to dinner.
Say what you will about Farrah Abraham, the girl knows how to hustle.
She’s got more revenue streams than the Trump family, and she did it all without colluding with any foreign dictators … we think.
Granted, most of Farrah’s business ventures have something to do with her vagina, but you can’t fault her for cashing in on her most lucrative body part.
Farrah’s sex tape and the notorious plastic molds of her various orifices might get the most attention, but the 26-year-old has many other irons in the sex work fire.
In addition to Farrah’s live stream masturbation venture (which may or may not have gotten her fired from Teen Mom: OG), Ms. Abraham has also been known to take the stage and work the pole at various strip clubs.
Farrah has a high-profile holiday-themed gig coming up at Crazy Horse III in Las Vegas, and it seems she’s pulling out all the stops.
According to Radar Online, Farrah is requesting a number of big-ticket items in addition to her appearance fee, including, “neon panties and a vajazzle kit.”
Yes, Ms. Abraham won’t take stage without a fully-bedazzled vadge.
As you may know, Farrah underwent a vaginal rejuvenation procedure back in August, which means her hoo-ha-related expenses for 2017 are likely now in the six-figure range.
But hey, this woman knows you have to do what it takes to keep your star player happy.
Unexpectedly, the rider for her Crazy Horse gig also reveals a selfless side of Farrah, as she reportedly requested $ 3,000 in “Diamond Dollars,” a sort of club-issued currency that she can use to tip her fellow strippers.
Yes, the Crazy Horse chain of strip clubs prints its own money.
Our advice? Forget that Bitcoin nonsense and invest all your savings in Crazy Horse Diamond Dollars.
We’re kidding, please don’t do that.
In addition that vagina jewels and stripto-currency, Farrah has reportedly requested a “24k gold collagen breast firming gel mask.”
Yes, Farrah wants her bosses to pay for some sort of gold potion that will apparently make her breasts more stage-ready.
Imagine being hired for any sort of job and telling your new boss that in addition to your fees you’re gonna need a teacher’s salary worth of boob goo.
It might be the va-jay-jay that she’s cashing in on, but what’s really impressive about Farrah is her balls.
Watch Teen Mom: OG online at TV Fanatic for more of the gloriously asinine Farrah Abraham.
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