As you’ve lkely heard by now, Kim Kardashian welcomed her third child this week.
The baby girl was born via surogate, and the identity of the woman who carried Kim’s baby has been kept a secret.
So obviously it was Kylie Jenner.
We kid, of course, but believe it or not, the theory thay Kylie was Kim’s surrogate has gained traction on social media in recent weeks.
At first glance, the story seems ridiculous.
But we have to admit, the lunatic conspiracy theorist inside of us is slightly intrigued.
So let’s put on our tinfoil hats, flush our meds down the toilet, and go full Alex Jones with this thing, shall we?
The rumors began when fans started to wonder why Kylie was being so secretive about her pregnancy.
After all, this is a woman who doesn’t brush her teeth without Snapchatting about it, and now that she has something as interesting as a pregnancy going on, she disappears from social media entirely?
It doesn’t quite add up.
Sources close to the 20-year-old say Kylie is just self-conscious about her changing body.
Others apparently feel that if Kylie went out in public, her fetus might strike a risqué pose for Paper magazine, or snatch a microphone away from Taylor Swift, or otherwise give away its identity as Kim and Kanye’s child.
Whatever the case, the secrecy of Kylie’s prenancy coincided with the effort to keep the identity of Kim’s surrogate under wraps, and folks of a certain mentality (the type who would’ve used the term “grassy knoll” a lot in a previous generation) feel that’s simply too coincidental to be … a coincidence.
On Monday, several media outlets reported that Kylie had gone into labor, and while it those reports were later disproven, Kard clan fans rushed to social media to share the news that the jig was officially up:
“This is so weird.. Just 2 days ago it was reported that Kylie was in labor.. which they later said was ‘false.’ Now Kim & Kanye are welcoming their new baby into the world? So all this time Kylie was really the fucking surrogate?” wrote one twitter user.
“I love that @KylieJenner clearly had @KimKardashian child. Rumors Kylie went into labor a few days ago and now boom kim announcers her child was born Monday through surrogate,” commented another.
“Y’all find it a coincidence that Kylie was rumored to have gone into labor this weekend and then Kim welcomes baby #3 on Monday?” a third tweeted.
Again, we suppose it’s possible that Kylie was Kim’s surrogate … but it’s also possible that Ted Cruz’s father killed JFK.
Many of the surrogate truthers out there are neglecting one important fact:
Kylie has built a career on the strength of her surgically-enhanced physique.
Maybe she would sacrifice all that to carry her sister’s baby, but if she did, she’d be announcing her decision on the cover of People.
These are Kris Jenner’s daughters were talking about here, folks,
They know a thing or two about publicity.