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Jersey Shore Family Vacation: New Trailer Released!

Remember back in November, when we told you that you'd see the familiar stars from Jersey Shore return to MTV and your television screen in 2018?

Well, it's 2018. And MTV has dropped a new trailer, teasing locations where we might see these infamous beach hooligans.

Honestly? This trailer, which you can watch below, looks bonkers.

Jersey shore threesome

"No," you say, backing away in disbelief. "No, it's 2018, and the only orange idiot on television is the one who somehow lives in the White House."

One, it's funny that you should say that, as you'll see when you watch the video below.

Two … Jersey Shore: Family Vacation is a real thing that is happening in the year 2018.

And during the season finale of Floribama Shore, a show that sounds like a parody of Jersey Shore (and … kind of is), MTV aired a new teaser trailer for the revival series.

Jersey shore family vacation

Before you worry that these won't be the familiar faces that you remember, know that time has passed, but they wouldn't be doing this if they couldn't do a decent job of getting the gang back together.

Here's a list of returning castmembers:

-Deena Nicole Cortese

-Paul "Pauly D" Delvecchio

-Jenni "JWoww" Farley

-Vinny Guadagnino

-Ronnie Ortiz-Magro

-Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi

-Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino

Jersey shore family vacation 2

Sammi Sweetheart is not returning. We're sure that he'll be missed.

In the new teaser for the show, MTV asks the real questions, like "Where the f–k they going?"

And they tease a number of possibilities:

"F**kin' New York? F**kin' Dallas? F**kin' Chicago? Ole F**kin' Faithful? F**kin' Miami? F**kin' Las Vegas? F**kin' Grand Canyon? F**kin' San Fran? Mt. F**kin' Rushmore? F**kin Seattle?"

As you watch the video below, try to decide for yourself which of these are actual destinations.

Or … are all of them destinations?

Jersey shore family vacation 3

Many of the stars are arguably different people than they were in their misspent youth.

We should mention, of course, that Vinny Guadagnino is one of the stars who's changed the most.

Remember when Trump tried to bash climate change and got roasted on Twitter?

One of the people tweeting at him was none other than the esteemed Mr. Guadagnino, who actually went on to get an education and is clearly better informed than and more competent than Donald Trump.

Seeing a reality star President get taken to task by another reality star is just … part of the world in which we all live, now.

Oh, and speaking of the Orange Menace:

Jersey shore family vacation 4

Though countless people would tune in, we cannot imagine that the Jersey Shore crowd meets with Trump.

And not only because he'd see their tans and assume that they're … not the sorts of people with whom he freely associates.

But maybe they visit D.C. and, from a distance, muse about which of them might one day gain the confidence of a sizable minority of Americans and end up miserable in the Oval Office.

Or maybe they'll see the Washington Monument and start making dick jokes.

We'll all find out together.

Jersey shore family vacation new trailer released
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The Bachelor: Winter Games Cast List Released! Who’s Missing?!

If you already follow The Bachelor Spoilers, you have a pretty good idea of how this season ends.

But you have something else to look forward to, starting the night before Valentine’s Day. It’s something new.

It’s called The Bachelor: Winter Games, and now we finally know the cast. And there’s a huge surprise!

The Bachelor is about a man trying to choose one woman among many to be the love of his life … for a few months, usually.

The Bachelorette has the same premise, but with a woman choosing between male suitors.

And then there’s Bachelor in Paradise. On that messy, messy spin-off, faves (and villains) from the two leading shows meet, mingle, and hook up for everyone’s entertainment.

Premiering on February 13th, The Bachelor: Winter Games is going to work along similar lines, in that the people you see will be familiar faces from the Bachelor Nation.

Or should we say … the Bachelor Nations.

As ABC explains:

“Throughout the run of The Bachelor Winter Games, fans can expect twists and turns on and off the ski mountain, as well as romance, heartbreak, love and, of course, roses.”

Contestants will come from Bachelor spin-offs from all over the world. Because yes, the franchise is that big.

“The bachelors and bachelorettes will participate in challenges from winter biathlon to ice dancing, with date cards being given to the winners of each challenge.”

Hopefully, things won’t be too athletically strenuous. They’re all beautiful, but most have desk jobs.

“Romantic dates will test the bachelors’ and bachelorettes’ perseverance in pursuing relationships with one another while faced with language barriers and cultural differences, including some amusing issues with intimacy.”

So, in case you were worried that there wouldn’t be any romantic drama … you can stop worrying.

Let’s take a look at which familiar names and faces will be representing Team USA!

Ben Higgins

Michael Garofola

Dean Unglert

Ashley Iaconetti

Luke Pell

Eric Bigger

Lesley Murphy

Josiah Graham

Clare Crawley

Jamie Kocan

Other contestants will be playing for Australia, Canada, Finland, Japan, Switzerland and Germany (one team), the UK, New Zealand, and China.

Incidentally, when we told you about this series event months ago, we mentioned that Peter Kraus would be making his Bachelor come-back on this spin-off.

It’s strange to not see his name on this list.

Don’t get us wrong — we’re excited for other things, from absolute legend Nancy Kerrigan’s promised appearance (as a guest) to what we hope will be Dean Unglert’s redemption arc.

But it’s not just that people in general would like to see Peter Kraus on the show. We heard months ago that this was his next thing. So … what happened?

Maybe this twist is just because of a falling out between Peter Kraus and producers. We sure hope not, but it’s possible.

It may be, however, that he will be on the list … but was for some reason momentarily excluded. Perhaps because he was already known? That doesn’t make sense, but we’re spitballing, here.

It is also possible that Peter Kraus has something else lined up on this franchise. Perhaps something a little more exciting … like, say, if he’s already lined up to be The Bachelor in 2019.

Finally, it’s possible that he just had an injury or something else that prevented him from taking part. Which would be tragic on multiple levels.

ABC is expected to release two more names for the cast list (at least). Perhaps Peter’s will be one of them.

We’re not sure, but we’ll be sure to let you know when we know more.

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Charles Manson’s Death Certificate Released, Died of Cardiac Arrest & Colon Cancer

Charles Manson died of acute cardiac arrest and complication of a battle with colon cancer. TMZ just obtained Manson’s death certificate — released by Kern County — and it lists cardiac arrest as the immediate cause of death. Respiratory failure…

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Charles Manson’s Death Certificate Released, Died of Cardiac Arrest & Colon Cancer

Charles Manson died of acute cardiac arrest and complication of a battle with colon cancer. TMZ just obtained Manson’s death certificate — released by Kern County — and it lists cardiac arrest as the immediate cause of death. Respiratory failure…

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Adam Lind: Released From Jail as Chelsea Houska Moves to Change Daughter’s Name

It’s been a rough year for Adam Lind, and sadly his destructive behavior has taken a severe toll on his loved ones.

His downward spiral began back in June when Lind tested positive for methamphetamines just prior to a scheduled visit with his youngest daughter.

Sadly, the incident did not serve as a wake-up call for Lind, and his life appears to have been on a steady decline ever since.

Last month, Lind was arrested on domestic assault charges after allegedly attacking an ex-girlfriend.

Earlier this week, Lind was arrested again for violating an order of protection against a different ex.

While he was behind bars, another restraining order against Lind was granted to former girlfriend Stasia Huber.

Earlier today, Lind was released from prison, but as you might’ve guessed, his legal issues are far from over.

“His bail was dropped because he agreed to show up at court for his next hearing,” a court officer told Radar Online.

Yes, if there’s an upside to having constant court dates, it’s that you can appease the legal system simply by promising to come back when you’re supposed to.

That’s the good news for Lind.

The bad news is that his first baby mama, Chelsea Houska, is reportedly taking steps to change her daughter’s name from Lind to Lind-DeBoer.

Now, it’s possible the move has nothing to do with Lind’s latest legal issues.

But we doubt it.

And hey, we suppose it’s possible that Lind will take the move in stride and handle the blow to his ego in a mature level-headed fashion.

But that also seems like a major long-shot.

And unfortunately, that’s probably just the beginning of Adam’s troubles with Chelsea.

The parents of 8-year-old Aubree are due back in court for a custody hearing on January 8.

At that time, it’s expected that Chelsea will request further restrictions on Lind’s visitation rights.

She’s already arranged it so that his vists with Aubree are supervised and he’s no longer permitted to frive with his daughter in the car.

It’s almost like smoking meth and assaulting women will make people question your parenting abiities.

Go figure.

If you need to be reminded of just what a horrendous dad Adam really is, follow the link to watch Teen Mom 2 online at TV Fanatic.

He’s almost certainly worse than you remember.

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