It’s been an interesting 12 months in the life of Taylor Swift.
A comprehensive year-in-review for the singer would touch on everything from her intensifited celebrity feuds to the alleged connections between Taylor and Donald Trump to the shocking death of the Old Taylor.
But today, we’ll focus exclusively on two issues of growing importance to both Swift and her fan base.
We’re talking, of course, about Taylor Swift’s boobs.
Fans and certain media outlets are convinced that Taylor’s had work done thanks to recent photos that show the pop star looking somewhat bustier than usual.
If you like to keep abreast (tee-hee) of the latest rumors surrounding Swift, then you’re probably aware that this is nothing new.
Taylor boob job rumors seem to surface about once a month, but we can’t recall a time in which they’ve been voiced with such certainty.
“Taylor’s boobs look huge,” TMZ stated bluntly this week.
“I must have missed something when did Taylor Swift grow boobs?” one fan commented in response to the same photos.
But perhaps no one has gone to creepier lengths to figure out exactly what’s going on in Taylor’s bra than the ever-unscrupulous folks at Page Six.
The outlet went so far as to recruit thw world’s bro-iest plastic surgeon in order to assess photos of Taylor and offer his opinion on whether or not she’s undergone breast augmentation.
After presumably offering a round of fist bumps and a protracted “niiiiice,” Dr. Matthew Schulman concluded that Taylor totslly probably had ber boobs done.
“[Taylor] has always had a very petite chest but recent photos seem to show a fuller chest and more cleavage,” he told Page Six.
“We know that Taylor has a friendship with many Victoria’s Secret models, so it is possible that she is rocking a new bra.”
Clearly, Dr. Schulman is a true professional.
We all know that familiar moment during any check-up when your doctor days, “Giiiiiirl, I know who you’ve been hanging out with!”
As far as we can tell, there’s a whole cottage industry of plastic surgeons who rarely perform any procedures and spend most of their time offering insights on the changing appearances of celebrities.
And since a “yeah, she looks about the same” quote probably won’t get printed, their professional opinions tend to run toward the scandalous.
As for whether or not Taylor really went under the knife, our wholly unprofessional opinion is that she did not.
The woman’s been in the public eye long enough to know such a change wouldn’t go unnoticed, and she’s secure enough in herself that we feel like she would just come out and admit it.
Plus, she runs with that whole Victoria’s Secret crowd, which means she has access to boob-enhancing technology that won’t be made available to the rest of the world for several decades.