For a guy who’s going to prison, Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino’s got a lot to smile about because he won’t be locked up until next year … TMZ has learned. According to docs filed Monday … Sitch must surrender to the Bureau of Prisons no sooner…
The American people deserve an FBI investigation into President Trump’s taxes because where there’s smoke, there’s often fire … according to Ron Howard, who says there’s only one reason it hasn’t happened yet. The beloved director,…
Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino is planning on a life of luxury when he gets home from prison … Exhibit A — his wedding registry. The Situation is marrying college sweetheart Lauren Pesce, November 1 (he has 60 days to turn himself in)…
Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino’s pals from ‘Jersey Shore’ aren’t going to leave him hanging now that he’s been sentenced to hard time. JWoww, Pauly D, Ronnie, Vinnie, Angelina, Deena and Snooki all showed up at Sitch’s apartment in Long Branch, NJ…
Forgive the most obvious pun in the history of writing, but it simply must be done.
And here it goes:
Mike Sorrentino officially finds himself in a bad situation.
As sorry as we are for going there, we’re guessing this Jersey Shore mainstay is even more sorry at the moment for having not paid his taxes back in the day.
He has been sentenced to eight months in jail as a result.
The MTV personality and his brother Marc were indicted in September 2014.
Then, in January of this year, they pleaded guilty to one count of tax evasion and actually faced a five-year prison sentence. (Marc was sentenced to 24 months in prison on Friday.)
Fast forward seven days to this morning and The Situation was accompanied to the courthouse by fiancee Lauren Pesce.
All the familiar Jersey Shore names — Jenni “JWoww” Farley, Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi, Deena Cortese, Ronnie Ortiz-Magro, Vinny Guadagnino, Pauly “DJ Pauly D” DelVecchio and Angelina Pivarnick — were all spotted on the scene as well.
So Sorrentino at least had plenty of support when he learned his fate.
On top of the eight-month prison sentence, Mike must also complete 500 hours of community service and was given $ 123,913 in restitution already paid, plus a fine of $ 10,000 that must be paid within 30 days.
The day before the sentencing, Snooki told Us Weekly that the cast was “hoping for the best,” adding of The Situation:
“He’s just such a good person. He changed for the better. He’s a totally different person. He doesn’t deserve this right now, but obviously you gotta get that done.”
Sorrentio and Pesce are allegedly planning a prison wedding at some point within the next year, as Mike tries to give himself something positive to look forward to in light of this news.
In pre-sentencing memos obtained by the Associated Press yesterday, Sorrentino’s lawyer argued he should receive probation, stating that the MTV star played a minimal role in the supposed financial conspiracy …
… and has worked diligently to overcome substance abuse in the time since his arrest.
Conversely, prosecutors asked for a jail sentence of 14 months, arguing that such time would send the message that “tax fraud will be met with real punishment.”
They also noted that Sorrentino’s substance addiction didn’t stop him from structuring cash deposits to avoid government scrutiny.
Sorrentino has been to rehab on two occasions to try and overcome this addiction.
Earlier this year, he told People Magazine that he has “worked so hard to turn my life around and be the best person I can be,” adding the following of appearing on Jersey Shore: Family Vacation Season 2.
“I had a very strong foundation for my recovery with over two years [sober] when I entered the house.
“But I did have to challenge myself to go out and film a whole season of Jersey Shore and have fun without alcohol — to show the youth out there that it is possible.”
The Situation’s status for Season 3 of this reality show revival is unknown right now.
But it isn’t looking good.
It’s D-Day for Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino – who just arrived at federal court in Newark, NJ to find out if he’s going to prison for evading his taxes — and he’s got the whole ‘Jersey Shore’ crew with him. The ‘Jersey Shore’ star is…
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Remember back in the old days of Jersey Shore, before any of the cast members had kids and they were just out there, living their messiest lives?
Those were wild times, right?
And, looking back, they were actually kind of sad times, too.
While Ronnie and Sam’s terrible relationship made for some fantastic reality television, it was also pretty remarkably unhealthy.
Since Ronnie’s in another remarkably unhealthy relationship these days, complete with domestic violence charges, things obviously haven’t changed too much for him.
Snooki and JWoww are both married with kids, and Deena is married and pregnant.
Sammi is trying to lead a more private life now with her boyfriend, and Pauly D and Vinny both seem happy with the lives they’ve made for themselves.
As for Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino … boy, he sure was a piece of work, huh?
He partied as much as the rest of his co-stars back in the day, maybe even more.
After all, he did go to rehab in 2012 to get help for an addiction to pills.
In 2015, he suffered an injury at the gym, and his doctor prescribed him painkillers, which led to a relapse.
He went to rehab again after that, and as he announced in a new post on Instagram, he’s been clean ever since!
In his post, he shared two photos — one of him in the neck brace he wore in season four after he ran headfirst into a wall during an argument with Ronnie, and one of him proposing to his now-fiancée, Lauren Pesce.
“33 Months Clean & Sober,” he wrote for his caption.
“Went from Running into a Wall to Down on One Knee. We do recover.”
It has been a pretty amazing transformation, honestly.
And most of his fellow Jersey Shore cast members have taken the time to praise him for his hard work.
“Proud of u my bro,” Pauly D wrote in a comment on Mike’s post.
“Love you Mike!!!!!” Deena told him. “So proud of you brother.”
Snooki said “I am legit crying im so proud of you,” which is really sweet.
Even Angelina popped in with a simple comment of “resilience,” and how crazy is that?
Besides the Jersey Shore crew, tons and tons of his followers flooded the comments to tell him how proud they were of him, what a great role model he’s become, that sort of thing.
And those people are right — he really has turned his life around in a major way.
Back in the day, he was really just a seriously obnoxious douchebag who got arrested and sued pretty regularly, and he even thought it was a good idea to commit tax fraud.
Just take a look at the top portion of that “then and now” photo he shared: that’s a photo of a guy who got into a dumb argument with his roommate and decided to ram his head directly into the wall for reasons that we still can’t quite understand.
But now, he’s settled down, he’s pretty likable, he’s getting his legal issues sorted (even if that means spending some serious time in prison).
He’s even getting married.
So good on you, The Situation. Good on you.
And so it has come to this, America:
Omarosa Manigault-Newman, a failed reality contestant who got to know the President of the United States back when he was a reality show host, is making major headlines for a recording she made of her firing.
The firing took place early in 2018 and was carried out by Chief of Staff John Kelly.
For whatever reason, Kelly told Omarosa that she was a goner from The Situation Room, which is the same secure location from which the country plans wars and raids and, like, the most confidential stuff out there.
But that wasn't all.
During an interview on Meet the Press with Chuck Todd, Omarosa secretly taped this firing in order to prove that she did NOT flip out when it occurred, as had been previously reported.
This would be an unusual enough of a move even before we stop to emphasize:
OMAROSA MADE THE RECORDING FROM INSIDE THE SITUATION ROOM.
What the heck kind of a$ $ backward security system is in place when a reality-show-contestant-turned-random-political-advisor can just sneak a cell phone into a meeting with the President's right-hand made and his Record?
Heck, when anyone can do this?
In the recording, Kelly calls for Manigault-Newman's "friendly departure" from the administration without any "difficulty in the future relative to your reputation."
Omarosa interprets this as a threat, telling Todd that the phrasing clearly implied Kelly would soil said reputation if Omarosa did not go away quietly.
(And this is when we must point out that we are not in any way defending Omarosa in any of this. Her only reputation is that of a total attention-starved loser. We're not sure how it could be soiled any futher.)
"We've got to talk to you about leaving the White House," Kelly says in the tape, adding:
"It's come to my attention over the last few months that there's been some pretty, in my opinion, significant integrity issues related to you and the use of government vehicles and some other issues."
After getting canned, Omarosa appeared on Celebrity Big Brother and claimed she only took the White House position because it was a "call of duty" and because she had to serve and protect the country from Trump.
What a hero, right?
You can listen to the full recording here and, as you do, keep in mind that the real loser here is no Omarosa for once.
"This is a HUGE security violation. HUGE," wrote Laura Rosenberger, the director of the Alliance for Securing Democracy and a former Hillary Clinton adviser, on Twitter Sunday.
"Makes you wonder what other kinds of security breaches are occurring under this White House. "
The problem with reality television in the age of social media is that real-time spoilers are pretty much unavoidable.
For example, we’ve known for months that Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino is engaged to Lauren Pesce, so any suspense on last night’s Jersey Shore Family Vacation regarding whether or not JWoww will ruin his proposal because Mike threatened to throw a pie in her face (?!?!?) didn’t really have us chewing our cuticles with anticipation.
But before the guidos could make way for Lauren, they had to say goodbye to Vinny’s mother, Paula, and his uncle Nino.
There’s a strong possibility that Vin’s uncle is named Nino Guadagnino, but that doesn’t even crack the top ten on the list of funniest things about the guy.
So it makes sense that Vinny and company would decide to hit him with an old-fashioned roasting as a parting gift.
Unfortunately, Nino’s neurons have been pounded flat like a cutlet from five decades of constant chianti consumption, and he now only speaks a language of his own invention, a la Nell.
Meanwhile, Paula advises Ronnie that he should hold off on marrying Jen if he’s not certain that he loves her.
Yes, folks, it was bound to happen eventually — someone finally issued good advice on an episode of Jersey Shore.
As we mentioned earlier, there’s a subplot in which Jenni indignantly adjusts her old lady glasses while threatening to mess up Mike’s proposal to Lauren, but we’re almost certain nothing is gonna come of it.
And thus, as has so often been the case this season, the episode really belongs to Ronnie.
In a surprising conversation with the girls, Ron reveals that Jen cheated on him in the past:
“I want to be with her, I love her, I just don’t know where her heart is,” Ronnie says.
“Truthfully, I just don’t trust her.
“Nobody’s perfect. I did my dirt too so I can just say, like, ‘It was her.’ But everything I did was a reaction to her actions,” he continues.
“I’m also not used to being with someone like myself. Like, I met my match.”
Jeez, she’s been pregnant the whole time they’ve been together! Where did she even find the time?!
The sad confessions continue — appropriately enough — in the confessional room, where Ron breaks down in tears after confessing that he’s jealous of Mike’s, ahem, situation.
“I want a family, I want to be happy, I want to be in Mike’s shoes. I want to propose. I want to have the feeling of more than just, ‘We’re together and we have a kid.’ I want more than that,” says a tearful Ronnie.
“Everyone else goes and lives their lives, and they’re f—king happy and I don’t have all the s—t they have. It’s just me. Who the f—k is the right person at this point?”
We’d like to say there’s a happy ending to this situation, but — spoiler alert! — Ronnie and Jen are still fighting nonstop and making each other miserable.
In fact, just yesterday, filming on a second season of Family Vacation was halted due to the fact that the season was to take place in Vegas — where Ronnie and Jen live — and their relationship drama was so intense that the production had to be moved to Jersey.
When reality television producers are like, “Whoa, this is all way too intense,” you know things have gotten out of hand.
Watch Jersey Shore online to relive the many trials of Ron.