Kellyanne Conway Performs Stand-Up Comedy. For Real.

Kellyanne Conway made many people laugh last weekend when she offered up the term "alternate facts" as a euphemism for White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer straight-up lying to the media.

But a new video of Conway actually acting as a stand-up comic has surfaced online.

And at no point in these 11-plus minutes does Donald Trump's trusted advisor make anyone laugh.

At least not with her.

The cringeworthy footage was filmed when Kellyanne was running The Polling Company and competed in a “Funniest Celebrity in Washington D.C.” charity contest in 1998.

Let's just say that she didn't win.

Then known as Kellyanne Fitzpatrick, the shameless hack tries to quip about the reasons why her foot is in a cast, while also tossing out some lawyer one-liners and even combining child abuse with the Washington Redskins at one point.

(Sample joke: "What’s the one difference between a pundette and Ally McBeal? Ally McBeal’s on a major network.")

As a grand finale, following several minutes of groans and/or silence from the crowd, Kellyanne sings… while dressed in a red feathered boa.

The song she sings is titled "The Pundette Blues.”

We don't want to criticize this so-called performance too harshly, out of fear that Kellyanne will find us and punch us in the face, but it's slightly off-tune.

Whatever you think of Conway as a human being, she is actually a terrific surrogate for Trump. She serves her purpose very well as his spokesperson.

So let's give her some credit for realizing that her future was definitely NOT in stand-up comedy, as we watch her bomb worse than Jeb Bush as a Presidential candidate:

Kellyanne conway comedy routine surfaces delights internet