Stormy Daniels Writes at Length About Donald Trump’s “Unusual Penis”

Stormy Daniels is coming … out with a new book.

The strong and proud porn star has penned "Full Disclosure," a memoir that mostly details her affair with Donald Trump.

The affair took place prior to Trump being elected President and Daniels writes in the book that she was in literal shock as Trump continued to win primary after primary in 2016.

But who really cares about her political opinions, right?

We know you're all here to read what Daniels had to say about sex with Trump, and we promise:

She does not let you down.

Consider yourself warned and then click through the following photos and slides to see to whom Stormy Daniels compares the President of the United States.

1. Wait, Stormy Daniels Wrote a Book?

Full disclosure
Yes. Does this really come as a surprise? It will reportedly tell her “whole story for the first time” and it will be available for purchase on October 2.

2. Who is Stormy Daniels Again?

Stormy daniels up close
Here’s a quick refresher: Daniels slept with Trump in 2006. She says they only had this one sexual encounter, but that she kept in touch with Trump for several years afterward. One month before the 2016 Presidential Election, Trump has admitted to paying Daniels $ 130,000 in exchange for her silence over the affair.


Stormy daniels on cbs
Trump never signed this non-disclosure agreement and says he won’t be enforcing it and Daniels has been talking openly about their affair.

4. Oh, and Trump May Have Committed a Campaign Finance Violation with This Payment

Donald trump with a fist
It seems like he almost definitely did so. But that isn’t the point right now.

5. What IS the Point Right Now?

Stormy daniels in a jersey
Explicitly, how Daniels described the President’s unit. She gets into GROSS detail about it in this book. Are you ready to read it? Are you certain?

6. Okay. Here It Is:

Stormy daniels cleavage selfie
“He knows he has an unusual penis,” Daniels writes. “It has a huge mushroom head. Like a toadstool…”

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Donald Trump Discusses Baby Tiffany Trump’s Future Breasts in Resurfaced Footage

Last week, the legendary host of The Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous, Robin Leach, passed away at 76.

A clip of one of his old interviews, previously just a controversial footnote, has resurfaced in light of his passing because it is now very relevant.

In the clip that you're about to see, Trump discusses baby Tiffany Trump's legs and his hopes for her eventual breasts. Gross.

President trump

In the video from more than two decades ago, the late Leach asked Donald Trump which features baby Tiffany had of his and which she had from her mother, Marla Maples.

This is not an uncommon question — many people will point out that a baby has their father's eyes or their mother's ears or their grandfather's chin.

"Well," Trump replies. "I think she's got a lot of Marla. She's a really beautiful baby."

Trump then gets specific, saying: "She's, uh, she's got, uh, she's got Marla's legs."

Marla laughs — some say that she laughs uncomfortably, here, but we have to be careful to not project.

Donald trump discusses baby tiffany

Trump continues, and this is where his comments go from awkward to controversial.

"We don't know whether she's got this part yet," he says.

This is when he gestures to his chest, miming a pair of breasts while discussing a literal baby who is also his daughter.

"But," Trump concludes. Time will tell."

That is certainly not the worst thing that Donald Trump has ever said, or even the worst thing that he has ever said on camera. But … that's not saying much, is it?

Robin leach

As the Trump campaign reared its ugly head, his past comments resurfaced, including that infamous video.

But, in a 2016 interview with Inside Edition, Robin Leach actually defended Trump — or, at least, condemned his critics.

"I think it’s an overreaction to be really honest," Leach said. "And I think that it’s just the piling on of those that dislike Donald."

Some would say that comments like this are part of the reason for which people dislike Trump.

Leach continued: "You’ve triggered a thought that I should send him a note saying, ‘Sorry I asked the question 22 years ago. How ridiculous they dig it up now.’"

That would be a very strange apology. Generally, past controversies are fair game for politicians running for the most important office on the planet.

Trevor noah pic

During the election, Trump's comments were played and then mocked on a number of late night comedy shows, including The Daily Show With Trevor Noah.

"He could have said anything," Noah pointed out at the time. "And he went with legs and possibly boobs."

Pointing out that there were much better answers, Noah said: "We would have accepted pretty much any other body part."

"We know for sure that there’s no female too small for Trump not to reduce her to her body parts," Noah lamented.

"I don’t even think that Trump was trying to be funny or provocative," Noah assessed. "It just clearly shows that it’s an impulse for him."

That pretty much sums it up.

Tiffany trump swimsuit pic

It does seem that Donald Trump thinks of women as little more than the sum of whichever physical attributes of theirs he can sexualize.

That said, some have jokingly defended Trump's words — saying that the clip shows him speaking more favorably about Tiffany than he has about her since beginning his campaign.

Unlike Ivanka, whom Trump praises to a degree that many Americans consider "creepy," he has had very little to say about Tiffany.

It has been pointed out that, though he has tweeted plenty about Ivanka, he has tweeted more about that one time Kristen Stewart cheated on Robert Pattinson than he has about Tiffany.

But though it's unfortunate that Robin Leach's legacy includes him having defended Trump, he may have a point.

How much of the visceral disgust that people feel for Trump would they feel if someone they'd never heard of made those unnervingly sexual comments about their daughters?

Donald trump discusses baby tiffany trumps future breasts in res

Trump’s Ex-Lawyer Michael Cohen Enters Plea Deal for Bank, Tax Fraud Charges

Donald Trump’s former lawyer has surrendered to the FBI and reached a plea deal with federal prosecutors … so get ready for a tweetstorm from the Prez for the ages. Michael Cohen has just agreed to plead guilty to bank and tax fraud, as well as…